闹情绪

控制不了自己的情绪。。
把假的当成真的了。。
心，变得越来越狭窄。。
清楚的明白这负面的情绪是来自哪里。。
却说不出口。。
因为我明白那是多么的不合理。。
闹情绪的我。。真的很丑。。
我好像玩不起这个游戏。。
我是不是应该停下来。。

人生？

看了不同人的部落格。。
我发现人的心其实很接近。。
我们所面对的问题。。
其实每个人都有经历过。。
只是我们会把不好的一面隐藏起来。。
用好的一面迎接每一天。。

人的心都不圆满。。
每天都在追求更好的。。
也许这就是人生？
不断的寻找更好。。
拥有->放手->寻找->追求->拥有
不断的重复。。

A friend

Knw the person in an unexpected day.
Went to there and meet him for few times already.
We didn't talk much before.
Until the day I were lost control again.
Always, after a period..
I will did something abnormal..haha
I act like a "wen ti bao bao"..
Keep asking him question and want him to answer me..
Talking to him make me feel happy..
After that, I will always find him chat..
And he not like other guys,
will run away from me..
Because I know my action is like abit "hua chi"
So far, I still can maintain the friendship well..
I hope there will not be anything that will affect our friendship.J

It's really a black Friday

I'm not happy in these few days,

My heart is shouting..

It's hurt by everything.

Every1 will just blame me for my emo,

and no1 will care about my emotion.

Every time I will get the concern from other peoples who I ever ignored them.

Peoples that I really care always hurt me the most.

I'm envy to a family that can fun together. 

while I can't see it in my family. 

They will always ask u to go ahead.

They are looking down on me. I know it.

Just because of I addicting the game and acting like a child.

I admit that I m addicting to the game, 

But I didn't lose myself.

I didn't missed anything as a human.

I will act like a child just don't want them to worry me.

Lending people a hand is it so hard?

Why always they need help will ask from me,

When I need they don't.

Or they just see my needs as nothing?

They are the person that most close to me.

Why I will feel hurt facing them?

I seldom drop my tear.

But they always successfully make it drop.

Cant count how many times they make it as the amount is too big.

Shout to me and ask me go ahead? This is what you were promised about sharing? 

Ask me to use my own lappy and say u want to use the comp?

How about your lappy? It's dead? Or been stolen? Your lappy not let people to touch it and you not use it. 

Its okay if you let me know that you want to use it mannerly but u are not. U shout like the comp is exclusive to u. And not 1 time, is every second that you are home. Some times I will hope you not at home. The peace of family is gone since the day u accident. I did my best to repair our bad relationship and all my hard work is spoilt by your attitude. Admitting your bad temper isn't help anything if you are not going to correct it.

New Friends

Get to know 2 new friends in maple again.
They had lighten my hope to friend again.
My heart was broken badly till I decided not to believe anyone more.
Smiling had disappeared from my face long time.
Social has gone since the day,
Darkness were like belongs to me forever.

After stay in the darkness for few months,
finally I get the way to come out from there,
My smiles are going back to my face soon.
However, I'm a bit worry about the same things will happen.
Changes of relationship make me scare.

Wishes for u-Grace

A celebration were planning while we were busy on our life.

Such a surprisingly we will celebrate for u? haha..

That isn't a fully plan actually. 

Our plan were more amazingly..

Lunch, shopping (choosing present), movie, and celebrate with a lot of friends.

Anyway, hope you were enjoy in the day.

Time: 11p.m sharp

Venue: Bukit Mertajam (BM) Jusco

Date: 10th Sept 2010

1st Station is at the top level of the building. I believe most of the people know why. Is to see what the movie on board and buy the movie ticket. The movie has been chosen by us was the "Resident evil: After life". It is an interesting movie. Awaiting for the next chapter. 

After bought the ticket, the next station is to fill in our stomach. We went to Johnny to have our lunch. The meal set is very worth to eat. RM 8.90 can have a dish, a drink, a soup and a cup of aiscream. The aiscream so yummyyyy..Missing it now. We were having photo section after lunch.

After lunch, we asked the lady (Restaurant's manager) to help us take photo.

Shopping shopping...Time to have some exercise after lunch. Shopping is the choice for us.  4 rich gals at below~! See how much did they bought. lol..Gals are like pretty..ops..talk like that seems I'm not like a gal..haha..

wow...so many bags...

After finish movie, we went to shop shop again. And go to take the fruit cake celebrate at McD. 

Such a big cake. Can't imagine we can finish the cake within 30mins with 5 of us. Haha..

Our cute little princess blowing the candle ♥

Cute little princess feeding 5 of us a strawberry. Oh~So sweet. haha

no more

We don't understand each others.

Just because of a sentence, I believe you will understand me.

I'm not request for a fully comprehension.

We gone through many things.

In a year of life, we were close..

However, I didn't see you satisfy with what you have now.

You always seek for something that I don't know.

Alright, we will not understood a person fully.

I can let you to seek for what you want.

In all the ways you doing, 

ever you care to the person that care you in behind?

Maybe you think you treat me good enough as a friend.

I really appreciate what you did to me.

When I was in fearful, you did give me a power to stand up.

I do know myself have a lot of weaknesses.

But I do know that I have tried my best to mend our friendship too.

Since the time, we are not close anymore,

I can see you are just to maintain our relationship

but won't tell me what is in your heart.

Maybe you are blaming me for not telling you my feeling.

I'm a sensitive person. A small action can let me guess for a long time.

No need to deny it. Just think back what was happen in these few months.

Or you want to check back the record.

You are not the person always take the initiative.

That's all I can say.

(Ha..See till here..a stranger will think the person was my partner maybe.People ever think i'm les but im not. Whatever you think me are with your ordinary's view was not me. I'm not an unique person but just look for a trustful relationship. Family, Friends, or Love.)

Well, whatever is not mine will not be mine.

I know not many people can achieve my demand on relationship.

I won't impose a relationship that is not really.

I will take the lesson. I won't demand more. 

I won't sad for a person that are not understand me anymore.

I will not care to you anymore too.

I know you can find a lot of people to care you. 

All the best to you in future.

(Want delete all the contacts between us, u may do it. 

Not the first time I been treated like that.)

曾经，现在

曾经的快乐
现在的伤心
曾经的信赖
现在的怀疑
曾经的交心
现在的陌生
曾经的以为
现在的证实
曾经的梦想
现在的破灭

然而现在会是以后的曾经。。
人生不停的在走。。
犹如地球不停的在转。。
到头来。。
还是回到原点。。

The End?

Since when your reply is so short..
I was keep myself to ignore the emotion..
this is really hard to do so.
Because it has shown at our relationship..
I don't know since when we are less contact..
when contact...
there seems an obstacle between us..
not to let us go in each other's heart.

Every night I listen the song that you like..
It make me want to cry..
I were never has the feeling like this..
to somebody like you..
We are not a couple..
But the feeling to you was like you are my dear..
I was scare of my feeling because I know we were over close..
But I believe that you are worth for me to treat you like this..

There is a song to express my feeling..
"yi ge xiang xia tian, yi ge xiang chiu tian"
Because of the song,
I can stand strong to our relationship..
because I think we are same like the song..
yet I'm so disappointed now..

I don't know what the next step should I have..
I can go out with friends..whom never walk thru my heart..
I can chat, can smile, can plan outing with them..
But I never get satisfication from them..
I looking for the relationship that we were..
But I know I can't find it until the day...
I would like to ask the god..
The fate of us go to the end?
Can you give me an answer so I can move on to my next life..

Merdeka

31st Aug..Merdeka for Malaysia..

It was a significant day for Malaysian.

I can't remember since when..

31st Aug just a holiday for me..

It's a day let me escape from work/study.

In day of 24hrs..

Maybe there is a moment 

Just a moment..

I will still remember the meaning of day..

Other time I'm thinking what should I do in a day..

Mostly are enjoying my holiday with drama, song or internet.

Same for this year..I'm going to have a meet with friends..

We wanna have a shopping..

It might not be a full day shop..

But can let me pass my time without lonely..

Alright, hope there is a happy meet..xD 

New Template

I have use 3 hours to edit my blog's template.

The feeling of satisfaction is with me 

because I had found something new to my blog.

"translator", "calender", and "pao ma deng" which is at the top.

has been added.

Also some of the songs that I think are nice: 

Love by Hebe
寂寞寂寞就好 by Hebe

你为什么说谎 by Della

So far, I'm still finding: Nice Song and Nice Calender

Rope :D

Ytd night was felt in the dark hole again.
Don't wanna say what is the hole.
I feel lucky that I always can find a rope to let me climb up.
But I scare one day I can't find rope.
At that time, is it I gonna have a new born?
It's over..I should move my target.
Not to focus one target but many.
Good luck for me.

Special thanks to the "rope". XD